Playing Wii

Kyle: You know, I'm not sure what these people are doing over in these windows[of the other apartments] but they are either....playing the wii or.... I'm not sure.....having sex?

Me: What?! Really?

Kyle: Ah, no... they are definately playing the wii.

Fat SMOOTH Arm

Me: That picture of me makes my arm look fat.
Kyle: I think it's just.... what's the nice word for 'pale'?
Me: Fair?
Kyle: No...
Me: Ivory?
Kyle: No...I think it's just that your skin is really smooth...so it gives that illusion of being fat.

Ear

Kyle: Who else would you live with that could open things with their teeth?
Me: Mike Tyson?
Kyle: These aren't ears!

Big Kittehs!

Kyle: I WANT TO BE HIM. That's it... for the rest of my life I am going to be a BIG CAT MAN.

One of the odds....

Kyle: An ant just fell from my head!

Crash!

Kyle: A bandicoot needs his shoes.

Sloppy joe

Kyle: Oh god....there's meat in my hair.